I'm not much of an interior decorator, but I do know what makes everything look better: fire. Fire goes well with everything. Nobody ever looks at fire and goes, "ick...tacky." If fire didn't turn things into ashes, but could rather keep going continuously with no huge fuel cost, and it didn't produce large quantities of smoke, and the heat wouldn't cook you alive....a lot more things would be on fire right now for fashion purposes. Certainly, everything of mine would be. Sometimes when I'm just walking around I picture everything in flames...hot!

When I see a kid (5 years old or younger) running, I always imagine him falling to the ground and start crying. It makes me laugh inside.

Old people are to be humored because they have lived longer than me and I will eventually most likely become one of them. It's highly irritating when they reappear every STINKING YEAR. Sometimes I'm waiting in line and they take up the space with their oldness. It's a shame it's not socially acceptable to grab an old person by the folds of their wrinkly neck, yank them out of line and drop-kick their ass back to Minnesota where it belongs. Plus, I might hurt my foot.

Anyone with a Chihuahua or Poodle needs to be immediately cleansed from society. And all blogs are worthless studies of how much any idiot can write about his or her own worthless life. In fact, anyone with a blog is stupid.

Manners are not in style.

Which is better: to gripe about politics or celebrities. Worse? I'm getting the feeling that the E! Hollywood and shitty magazines supporting paparazziism are as dumb as as all those news articles about the Senate, Bush's talks, and government press releases.

Body Paragraph--[eliminated to due to time constraints]

In summary, Joe the Tool is no better than Captain Foreign Policy Discusser. They're both pointless. If I want to be happy, I cannot allow myself to ever write about celebrities or politics, and that's a scientific fact. I don't want to learn or overhear anything more about either. Stop fussing over other people's lives and do something with your own. Anyone who disagrees is wrong. Am I right?

Oh those silly goats.
http://www.yourdailymedia.com/media/1119129342

Something entirely different:

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/mensroom

Finally, I must cut to the picture of the day:

This is how I travel. I even have the same tweed hat.

totally awesome...

Now I'm off for Thanksgiving Break to consume as many turkeys as the next man or woman. Hopefully this post will stave off your cravings for more until I return next week! Cheers.