Tuesday, December 13

It's time for me to be an asshole again.

I've received a lot of spam and personally addressed emails, as well as shit in people's profiles telling me to think about the troops in Iraq. They want me to think and pray for them. Well I ain't praying for nobody, and I'm certainly not going to think of them. That's gay. I'm don't think about anybody unless I want to, and nobody's going to tell me otherwise.

Why is it they get all this special treatment? Is it because they are suffering and going through hard times? Maybe I am too, but we don't see anybody putting up a bumper sticker on their car that says, "support Casey" now do we? They're over publicized and over-hyped. My thoughts have to be saved for thinking about my friends and family, not people I don't even know.

I'm totally fine if someone you know is fighting and you're praying and thinking of them all the time, but you need to know your boundaries. Your boundary ends when you start telling me what to do. You're not the boss of me. Get in line. Wait...

Soldiers understand when they sign up for the marines and fly over to go fight that some people are going to die and get injured. They weight their options. Most of them are like, "shit, I got no money, and I'm not going to college...I should go train to kill people." There are always risks and consequences in any job. Maybe you should just think of their deaths as them getting an "F" in Bullet Dodging and Tactical Planning. We've got way better military technology and force than our enemies, so what's the big deal?

So let's say I do think and pray for them. Now what? Do I get a cookie? No? I guess I can just sit on my thumbs then.

You know, before the war, there wasn't all this publicity and people profitting from selling those bumper stickers. But people feel like they're behaving good when they slap one on their car, like they've done their part. You know, if I owe stuff to people, they're pretty much all dead, and I would've done the same thing in their situation. As for this war, it's unnecessary and a drain on our economy. They're getting paid to do their job. So is every other American worker, a lot of whom we rely on a lot harder as a society. We need policemen, grocery store workers, firemen and bank tellers. They affect my life in a direct way I can see. I prefer to salute them for their efforts in their workplace, and if they die whether it be from cancer or suicide or AIDS or glaucoma, I dearly hope they are replaced very quickly, because I don't feel like getting robbed by Joe Dirtbag.

Don't fall for the media hype about our military. You're only hurting yourself. If you see a soldier when he's returned, you can still tell him that he's been in your prayers every day. It's a white lie, like telling your wife she doesn't look fat in those jeans; everybody wins.

That's all I've got to say about that.

Oh, and I just ate a pound of applesauce.


Blogger Hollis undoubtedly said...

been there.. (apple sauce, not iraq)

12:35 AM  

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In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Blame Canada.