Sunday, January 29

If you are reading this, you have stumbled across the thoughts and thinky-do's of Casey. I have been away for a while, a month and thirteen days by my count. At least one person began to suspect I had died of eating too much cabbage in a sitting or trying to juggle proximity mines. This is not the case. Kate, I am both living and breathing, so you can calm your morbid thoughts.
What have I been doing? You aren't asking this question, but I'll pretend that you are. Aside from my usual capers around town, not much. I'm still at home right now because I didn't go back to the University at Buffalo. I didn't go back because I needed more time to solve my Rubik's cube. That thing is seriously hard. Even though I can tell the colors apart, the challenge is getting them to line up on the same side. I can get a side or two, but then the chaos begins. I hope you understand.

On the plus side, I won't be bitching about how stupid my classes are. On the negative side, people are beginning to doubt my skills. My friends are like, "are you ever going to get a degree?" Chill, homies. I'll handle this crap. I figure I've still got another two years until I'm able to purchase alcohol without the hassle of fake ID's, and then I can start getting my act together and focus on something productive, like research management, or how to glue my elbows together.

Since I haven't been able to play Halo or go online since my parents have a connection involving a dial-tone, I've read a bunch of books so cool you could read them and finish and be happy you read it. My mom can't read. I asked her why one day, and she said it was because her eyelids got really heavy whenever she tried to, and then she couldn't continue anymore. My first thought was that she was reading boring books, or that the words were too hard for her. Then, I remembered that she reads books with titles like: "Aroma Therapy: How to Go to Sleep with Candles," "The Wayne Norton Guide to Success," and "The Power of Positive Thinking." Despite its claims, its power was not enough to keep her awake. She has a book collection with a couple dozen books, none of them finished. I think she needs to get her act together and read Harry Potter, cover to cover, like everyone else. I, on the other hand, have read a bunch of neat books you should read including: The Andromeda Strain, Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus, Lord of the Flies, and The Perks of Being a Wallflower. For more of my favorites click here.

The facebook is getting on my nerves again. In accordance with the law, I will bitch about it. I hadn't been on in a month or two, I check it and suddenly I've got friends who want me to confirm how I knew them. There's this whole schpiel of "Friend Detail Request" things to check to acknowledge how I know them. It's getting too personal. I will not waste my time telling people I don't know how I know people they don't know. If I know them, it is enough. The thing that actually irks me about it is that I can't, or haven't discovered how to, deny them their request. All requests should be able to be denied. But my only options are to Confirm, Edit, or Reply....WHERE'S MY FREAKIN' DENY BUTTON!? They're piling up and I refuse to confirm or refute such allegations. This only adds to my image of facebook as a time consuming, pointless, stalker breeding site of doom and founder of ill-begotten hatred. If I am not appeased soon, I will seek help from the IRS or FBI. They owe me.

This also made my day today, aside from my trip to Alfred to see my Peeps (they were stale: but still full of sugary goodness):

With America losing The War on Drugs, Terror and even Christmas, it's nice to see we're winning The War on something: our environment.

Global warming is increasing, the oil reserves are drying up, and we lose another endangered species every five minutes. I could not be happier. Destroying the environment is good.

Let me put it another way. Let's say Jessica Alba's ass is the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. Sure it looks perfect and pristine. But honestly, how much better would it look if someone was tapping it, am I right?

Haha. Okay, that's enough. Settle down. I know it was hilarious. Now that I've filled another minute or two of your life with joy, go do something with yourself. I recommend joining my friend James' new dance company, which I have forever dubbed "Dancing With James." It should be a good time for all, especially if you're not participating.



Post a Comment

<< Home

In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Blame Canada.